A call to fight

I met Figueira and Zangrandi sitting on a concrete bench at Palmares Square. It was Zangrandi who saw me first. They remembered the vegetarian restaurant.
"I thought it was nice to hear about the Americans. They are right. It's good to hear it from people from the outside or else we'll think it's the right way forever and will never change. They think I'm the only one who thinks this way."
"I am glad to hear this is what you think, Zangrandi."
I asked Figueira if he thought what was said about him taking after Stone Cold was a compliment.
"No."
"So, you were ironic when you praised Roland's comment."
He looked at me.
"No, I was not."
"Then, I'm afraid I can't work it out."
Zangrandi laughed. Figueira had a serious look on his face.
"I thought he was clever to identify what style it was. And I agree with what Panotti said, that it was nice of them to care anyway. Americans already have a long history of wrestling. When I think about us practicing to be wrestlers in Brazil, I think it is the same for an American to be a football player. We swim against the stream, Miss Grisam. This is the country of football, not the country of wrestling."
"It doesn't justify wanting to use your knowledge for revenge, Figueira."
Zangrandi shook my hand, in agreement.
"No, it doesn't, and I try hard not to do it, but I can understand why we misunderstand the objective sometimes.", said Figueira, looking at me, "when we don't even know what to dream of, what to expect from what we are doing."
Zangrandi was astonished.
"Don't you know what your goals are, Figueira?", he asked.
I looked at Figueira, who didn't look back to me. He gazed into the skate area, a calm and thoughtful look gazing into infinity.
"I didn't. But now I think I begin to understand certain things I had never seen. What I want in the end is to be better than I am. I want to lose my fear of losing. I want to lose my fear of people. I want to lose my fear of fear."
"How does it feel at a tournament?"
"Shivers up and down my spine", he said, "when we go to the mat there's no telling..."
"I feel it too, but it's not so great, Figueira", said Zangrandi, "when the wrestle starts, I forget about it, I have to be alert."
"You've been pinned a number of times, haven't you, Zangrandi?"
"Everybody is, sooner or later. When I was not, won or lost because of points, or pinned the adversaries too. It happens to everyone."
Figueira said he had lost many of the matches he played at tournaments. From the many undoubted pins he managed to apply, was disqualified in six, for talking to the opponent.
"What is that you talk to your opponent, Figueira? I watched you yesterday, was curious to know what you said to Galhardo."
"He encourages the opponent to wrestle", explained Zangrandi, "it is his call to fight, he says. Figueira is a freaking nut, calling the opponent to fight even when he's mounting him."
"Is it true, Figueira?"
He had his eyes way down, trying to memorize his sneaker's brand. Didn't say a word. I shouldn't, but I insisted.
"Do you curse the opponent?"
"..."
"Do you curse him or not? You know you can't do it, don't you? Do you curse him?"
Figueira went red. All of a sudden he stood up and exploded, "No, there's no curse! I do call them to fight! I ask them how come they can be under me, under my control, holding my leg without fighting? I do call them to fight!"
"Easy my man, she's just asking you a question..."
Figueira fell on the bench and was breathless. "This is why I was disqualified six times. This is the reason why. But I don't care, as long as I can call them to fight."
He looked at me. I saw his attitude there, something he hasn't channelled to something positive yet. Figueira is too emotional. But I can't help thinking a call to fight is a beautiful thing. It sounds to me like trying to wake someone up. And if he's being true to me, what I have no reasons to doubt, does it mean he gives victory away to celebrate the fight? It can't, just can't be that strange. I tried to ask him about it further, but he was in no mood to talk about it anymore.

Real hangmen | The Column

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